New Year's Resolution - well sorta

I co-teach a Sunday School class.  It is the older children, grades 5 - 7 and since Sunday School in our church meets during the first half of the service, this year we decided to have breakfast together once a month and then go to church.  Otherwise the kids don't really experience the full service.  Most of them are not in church in the summer when there is no Sunday School.  For that reason they seldom experience what is my favorite part of the service, the reading of the Word and the preaching.  There is a rhythm to a church service and the Episcopal church follows a well thought out prayer book and when the children come in each week in the middle of the service they miss some of that.  But that is a discussion for another day.

At our breakfast this week, we discussed normal stuff and then brought up the topic of New Year's Resolutions. Nobody had really made any and nobody seemed overly interested in doing it.  I am not a big fan of the whole resolution thing, but it has gotten me to wonder.  I didn't overtly make a resolution, however with the new year I began writing in my blessings journal.  There were a couple of reasons for it.  The first was that I have been keeping this journal on and off for a couple of years and it tends to be a good thing for me to do, the second reason is that I really especially need it at this time of year.  I have a deep need to remember all the blessings around me and there are many.

During the dark winter days, I sometimes forget a bit who I am.  I lose sight of the faith that I have and my belief in a loving, forgiving God falls a bit by the wayside.    Most days I feel just fine, but I get a little blue and the apocalyptic tone of the press and the outside world really freaks me out this time of year.  Although I really do believe that things will be okay and "All will be well and all will be well and all manner of things will be well".  It behooves me to work on it at the moment to work on being happy.

So yesterday, it was a bit warmer than usual and Robert and I took a walk down to the beach.   There is a favorite inflatable dinghy that has oars still in it, that Robert is particularly fond of playing in.  I sat on the comfy edge of the dingy while Robert played away inside - imagining himself discovering treasures and I looked out at the view in front of me.  The sun was gently warming my back as seagulls flew and called around us.  There were a few duck families foraging about for food and I watched them stick their little rears in the air as they dove for treats.  Behind all this was the bridge and the lighthouse and the far away shore.  Sometimes I take for granted the beautiful place we live, but not yesterday.  It was a time out of time.

So this year my resolution is to seek out and recognize these blessings, I want to remember to cuddle a little closer to my boys who are growing each day, I hope I'll recognize the care and love of the folks around me and most importantly, I want to find ways to give back this love and care.  I hope I'll keep up my journal and maybe add a few of those blessings in length in this little blog, which I write ostensibly for whoever perhaps is reading it, but which also fulfills a need of my own to reach out and remark on this world around me which can be so inspiring and so confusing.

Happy New Year!