Yeah, Harry got his yellow stripe!

Here's the boy, in his whites with his new belt on.  After 5 months of taking classes he got his new belt.  I think he was very proud.  He was also very cautious.  It is something I have noticed recently.  There was a moment in class when it seemed they had forgotten him.  They'd called all the kids up who had tested, but not him.  Harry was upset, but when he started to say something, Master Jin went back and checked and his belt was there, just on a different shelf.  At least that is what I am telling myself.  Surely the teachers wouldn't have tested him even further to see if he really wanted the belt.

On the way home I sort of probed about how Harry felt about that little mishap.  I came away with the idea that perhaps this foray into martial arts is doing the opposite of what we had hoped.  Instead of making Harry more comfortable and confident in his body, it is making him notice that he doesn't quite have the same level of control that the other kids have.  I don't know, but I am proud of him and I  hope he is proud of himself.  He had to work twice as hard as the other kids to get that belt and that means something.  Sometimes I have to remind myself (more than I have to remind Harry, because overall he is a very confident child), that my job is to guide and him and let him learn.  I can't shield him from the unkindness of others forever, but I can do my best to keep him out of situations that are unnecessarily difficult.

My Mom loved this poem by Kahlil Gibran, On Children:

Your children are not your children.

They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.

They come through you but not from you,

And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts, 

For they have their own thoughts.

You may house their bodies but not their souls,

For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, 

which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.

You may strive to be like them, 

but seek not to make them like you.

For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children

as living arrows are sent forth.

The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, 

and He bends you with His might 

that His arrows may go swift and far.

Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;

For even as He loves the arrow that flies, 

so He loves also the bow that is stable.

Robert is still so little, but with Harry I already recognize that my main job sometimes is to provide a stable safe landing place.  I hope that I can do this for both boys as they grow and experience the wonders and the difficulties of this world.